I Love You always!

A wish

On Facebook November 19, 2012 at 10:34pm

Beautiful is you. With all that cracks and the imperfection. You are beautiful.

Stop seeing yourself with people's eyes, because you are too particular for those eyes.

Look yourself with your own eyes. And when you see yourself as others see you, do something with your eyes.

Talk to your eyes, to understand yourself more before understand people.

Understand what is beautiful and what is not.

Understand what is in the inside not only the outside.

Understand what you as you and not other.

I wish, i can convince you. Then you would not be confused of who you are and how you are.

One time i read a poem, that told me how God admire us as His creatures.

Understand that you are beautiful, so you can join HIM admiring His creatures.

In remembering of God's Admiration, St. Francis of Assisi.

  God's Admiration

 God's admiration for us is infinitely greater

  than anything we can conjure up

  for Him. 

Favor

On Facebook November 18, 2013 at 9:18pm 

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Here I'm with the old song

The old song of you

The old song that reminds me of the old me

The old me with old story

The story that i love until now

Until i have this minute to write it down 

The minute that reminds me how lucky was me

The minute that reminds me how lucky i am

This time that old song plays again in my head

It plays since that Saturday night

With the same tunes

As the same as i remember it was...

I'm still the same as in the old story

Young and careless

With the uncontrolled heart

Which always sings the same song...love song.

Love song

For the unplanning love

Love song

Of you

...God.

*Being young and careless is really a favor, especially for loving HIM, the Unfailing LOVE.

I love the project of love - Like this one!! SecretProjectRevolution in Rio de Janeiro

Thoughts of two brilliant people.

Spiraling in a circle of madness. Enraptured by the nightmares that plague my dreams. From which reality is true? The one where corrupted systems pollute the minds of billions, or the one where billions pollute the minds of each other? Time stands still only to move faster than can be measured. Traversing a dimension that has no flaws. Where only imagination can make a difference. Where sickened minds bleed diseased filth into the hearts of the masses. 

Spiraling in a circle of madness. Madness of us. When the light went off and all the senses went on. When the mind went wider and the view went smaller. One might could not do much and too little to be seen. One might could not do little and too big to be held. And the situation are going crazy while there's no such chances and changes. Crazy to feel and to touch of things which are not there for sight but for feel. The chaos of the unseen and untouchable things deep in thought - dream.

To which world do you belong? The world of right or that of wrong? A world where people judge or a world where they hold onto their grudge? A knife cuts across the skin, fresh blood has been spilt. once it heals Damaged scar reveals the ancient sin, proof of her guilt. Time does not allow her to repent the broken vow. Cast away. There to stay. Forbidden. Forsaken. Her only pleasure turned to pain.

When you only can fly and not walk, when you only can whisper but not talk and being understood by all the breeze and the sense even by the twinkle of your eyes when you smile. What would be less than that, even when you could not find the ...sight of the right and wrong, the judge and the defender? And knifes are wordless for skin and blood. Chains are unchained, walls are barrier-less, and sky's unlimited. This is the world that belong in me, to me. The world that in me. The world that time and limitation are hide and have vacation.

Chained and bound unto a wall. My body is scarred my thoughts are full of unrest. No matter my struggle the pain i must endure. For freedom means nothing to a body that is damaged bruised and broken. Yearning to break free of this prison. My mind is consumed in darkness. Cursed. The price of my freedom be death.

Death, you are not welcoming. Even you, promise me freedom. Even you, promise me wings from all this darkness around me, this pain around me, this bruised and damages. Death, you wait on that corner with smile, wait for my surrender time of... flying, ignore your presence and your claws that in trying to come in my skin in damn sure and slowly ways. No freedom and wings that you can give to me, NO. I won't be tricked. All the pain, bruised, damages and the darkness are yours. Count me out from your dead list. Anyway, my wings already fly and free me, be really die Death. No cry for you.

To die and truly find peace. Away from life's bitterness. I find warmth in Death's embrace. For my worries struggles and strife amount to nothing in the eyes of the divine. Fear not for i stay in vain. Fruitless are my efforts. results remain the same. Success or failure. Where is the fun? Win or lose. What does it matter? Life is nothing more than a game. The rules change everyday. May lady luck make me lucky today or i will be damned. Eternally against this fiery wall. Everlasting torment is my prize. Though i would gladly exchange it for just one more chance at the dice roll. All these thoughts circling my mind. Like pieces of a puzzle. This game isn't over yet. Now to find the missing piece that has it all make sense.

Missing piece always is there. The joy of the look would find it. And the handy hand would grab it. The fruitless are only imagination. Imagination of the unspeakable touch. Struggling we are, here and now. When all our pain are dancing, the cure are working and healing. Struggling we are, here and now. Without blood could cry out but smile. Luck won't need time to appear just need a little look. Here, we are to be the survivor, of all age of all time. So, having peace in death would be too simple to embrace. While one dot could end all the sudden, some comas would be nice to do. Like making some little steps on some little rocks on a beautiful river. A little hop on a little rock. With a picture of you in every hop on the water river above. All are not make sense, all are there.

Dancing, what is that? For I have danced before. My partner tripped and fell to her untimely end. Here I still stand, dancing by myself. In sorrow and guilt. For she will never dance again. Death took hold as my new partner. Leading me astray. Into the darkness. It felt good to have another lead this dance. For my worries and fears melted away into the night. Allowing another to capture my desire. Little did I know, the more we danced. The deeper Death dug his claws into my spine. Wrapping his cold numb claws around my heart. I felt them, I did. Piercing my soul. Promising my one true wish. To be with her again. He would have had another victim, had it been to late. Breathless, struggling, anxious, my mind emblazoned with a new passion. To fight. To live. For my own survival, and the hell with everyone else. Though that was not enough to break free from Death's clutches. This fight was not just my own, but that of everyone I knew. They held their arms out to me. Aiding me along my journey. Finally free. I dance again. Full of spirit, full of joy. Though my dance with Death was anything but. I did enjoy myself. That I cannot deny. I will not deny. For he will trick me again with that fateful question: Didn't we have fun? As true as those words struck me. I will admit. That a small part of me belongs to Death. Though only a small part, I will not give up the rest of my entity. For I am myself again.

https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9nYiUA8e1Aj3O_w6CR1zX6nGCiyTyEiLmbqmVY_MLIBGnpxKVnT8SuLSQAMhnwZLkT9LXnwhC8HQPDKwaQw8vDwzUo2v2QNaPso9K64KJh5vGMCwy_A276i9QRB6Rfl6kg9r4HIfsOwY/s1600/Thoughts+without+dreams_a+drawing_detail.jpg

First collaboration with Jordan Colby - In Bold Writing
 

*My spin dancing for the chance.
Friday, October 28, 2011 at 7:49am Jordan Colby saved this on his facebook.




   

Marbles

Once upon the time, when time was sleep, there’s a man  who had a little boy inside in his, climbing the wall of time, drove his faithful car to reach one place where there’re more noises than just a breeze and water whisper. 

He broughts some beans, coins and dew in his backpack. He dropped all that things inside his bagpack put them among his bagpack’s permanent residences, such as seeds, flowers, leaves and some dark soil.

He wore his best coat, red transparant wavy one...with green head and purple word “Universe” on his left up arm, and shoes which had similar color with his pants, dark chocolate.

It was in the mid day, after the breeze exhaled for  the second time, he had his escaping jump.

Along the way of driving, he kept his mouth shut and praying that nothing could hear his dissapearing. Even he sometimes holded his breath or exhaled in really quiet way.

His faithful car run without track, so faithfully, trying to bring his master to find the more noises place that his master dreamed off.

In another place, where the noises’re too much, lived one friend of that man who had a  little boy inside his. She played marbles with him most of the time, for their colors and shape and their way of run and walk...which surely rolling and rolling. He and she’re new friend with their same believe that speed always be the important thing to have a good rolling of their marbles.

One time in between of that driving away time, there’s cloud and wavy wind. And the marbles’re abandoned. Rolling a little to the left side and to the right side. Among so much noises and the rolling marbles, she who’s  a friend of him who had a little boy inside his, wondered about his road and if he could find the more noise place that he longed for.

Than one picture came, a city train picture, with the train shape became the center of the picture, came to a friend of him who had a little boy inside his, she. With the line above it “Ini kereta jalan di kota yg tinggal saya :) ”.

Since that time, she who’s  a friend of him who had a little boy inside his, always tried to find him, he who had a little boy inside his, inside of the train picture everytime she who’s  a friend of him who had a little boy inside his, wondered of the road he who had a little boy inside his, had.

Story by Meitha Soekotjo, 16:04, 12/12/2011.

Picture by Caman Calmato Blue.

Made

That day came finally
the day of our first day
the day which filled of us
you and me

All without pause
no distance
no wait
I was there see you straight

Begin with stories
stories of you
my little one
of you Made

I could not change mine
of feeling
of wondering
of loving you

Then, jump!
yes, we did a jump
me to you
you to me

I didn't try to hide
or run
or pretend
even...saying "no"

Now, here without you
without straight sight
you are here
with me inseparable

I will be waiting
looking for
the moment
of us again - which is for forever

(for my beloved son, Made)

begin-ner

was I
have I
did I
not so sure
even
not so blur

I was
I have
I really did
some marks said so
some bruises tell me so

still I fall
still I'm bruised
and
surprise
for the feel and the sensations

cry and laughs
as I was not
have not
did not
ever be in

such a begin-ner
of falling
all over
of
love

picture: http://www.skatescool.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/05/beginner-inline-skater.jpg

Recycled Houses

Get in the Crowd

Once there was a moment for one girl to be curious about herself.
The moment happened for one time in one moment of her life.
After and before the moment ended, she needs to find herself ways to figure out herself.

Figuring out herself needs more than one moment.
Figuring out herself needs more than one way.
Figuring out herself needs more than one time to try.
The long way of curiosity.
The long way moment.
The long way in trying.

Once there was a moment for one boy to be curious about himself.
The moment happen for the whole his life.
With or without come to his way from figuring out.
Even so, he needs more than one moment, one way and one try to fulfill the curiosity.
As the same as the girl.

Silence

Today come after yesterday,
the day that you were here,
as today.

Yesterday finished before today,
when you are here,
as yesterday.

In silence we were..
In silence we are..

Love can never be so silence.
Love is too silence to be listened and too be loud to be spoken.
As we were..
As we are..
...in the silence and in the loud of our love.

"mine is yours"

Everybody might know how to say something, everything that he/she wants to say.
The sounds of the words could be different from each people.
The meaning of the words and sentences have a big possibility of differences, which the tone, the aim and the character from the person who talks gonna be the important things to consider.

So, when you hear someone talk to you of some words in some sentences, you will give one or some reactions, which is/are an/some output/s from the meaning of the words, the tone, the aim and the character of the person you get.

Making people get to know our character, that what we do everyday.
Most of us always stick to one character, or, most of us believe that he/she sticks to one character.
Do most of us stick to the one and only one character..?

Being oneself is what we do everyday...with only one or more character.
I've found, that some people like to be predictable and the others like to be not (in purpose and not in purpose).
And, for those who like to be unpredictable in purpose, should take "making the other people regret and feeling regret because of others" as an ordinary situation, with or without their acceptance to the situations.

We never know exactly who is the one we have conversation with, so understanding for everybody is the weapon to avoid the uncomfortable situation.
That's what we have to do, if we want feel comfortable in any ways.
And when there's someone seems having a big effort to discourage your understanding sense, giving a nice "walk away" action as your big understanding could be a choice then.

Understanding always becomes a top theme in friendship.
Does it..?
What will happen when the existing of the character sees the understanding as a barrier or just as a tool..?

When you love someone, understanding has became a theme in relationship too.
And there are some examples for giving the understanding on the above or under the existing of the character.

Do you mind if i say, one thing that we can share as "ours" or "mine is yours" or "yours is mine" is "The Understanding"..?
Actually, there are so many understanding has been given to us everyday..

The sunrise, the sunset, the moon, the stars, the rain, the snow, the falling leaves, the birth, the death, the smile, the tears, the knowledge, the hand, the leg, the foot, the brain, the lips, the chick, the chin, the eyes, the stomach, the heart, the
soul, the breast, the chest, the toe, the cry, the clothes, the pain, the shoes, the bible, the quran, the neighbor, the friend, the lover, the mother, the father, the child, the pet, the computer, the typewriter, the book, the mobile phone, the car, the train, the plane, the love, the hate, the sick, the health, you, me, us, they, mine, yours, ours, theirs, are some of it.

- how -

Everyday there's..
.. a must for something to be happened.
.. a time to be passed.
.. a routine goes on and on.
.. a new foot step made.
.. a hand reaching out.
.. a thing to be thought.
and..
.. a moment..when i find, you.

--mybedroomsept1609

...i have...

When we think that we are not alone...have we ever made a clear definition for "Not Alone"..?
If we look to some dictionaries, we won't find "Not Alone", we can only find "Alone".
So, we need to add "Not" to make a contrary meaning from the definition and finally we have "Not Alone".
The necessary to find out what's "Not Alone" might be not everyone need.
Actually, behind the exploration of it ("Not Alone"), there's a personal question, that "Are we really not alone when we think so..?"..(at least for the writer).

"Alone" in some dictionaries, it's gonna say:
- 1: separated from other 2: not including anyone or anything else
(The Merriam-Webster Dictionary - The Words You Need Today, Merriam-Webster, 1997, USA, page 38)
- without the company or help of others or other things
(Oxford Advanced Learner's Dictionary of Current English - Revised and Updated, A S Hornby, Oxford University Press, 1981, page 24)

Let's make a little exploration of them word by word, referring to "Not Alone"

First step, there are 2 words in "Not Alone", they are: Not + Alone.
So, for every definition, that has been found out, will be added "Not" to fit with "Not Alone"

Second, adding "Not" in front of each "Alone" definition.
They will be like these:

NOT + separated from other;
NOT + not including anyone or anything else;
NOT + without the company or help of others or other things.

Third, processing the blended of "Not" and "Alone" definitions.
From: NOT + separated from other = Not separated from other.

From: NOT + not including anyone or anything else
----= Not+not = Yes (Positive)
----= (Positive) Including someone or something.

From: NOT + without the company or help of others or other things
----= Not+without
----= Not+ (Not+with)
----= Not+Not+with
----= Yes (Positive)+with
----= (Positive) with the company or help of others or other things.

Fourth, making a temporary conclusions for the definition of "Not Alone".
"Not Alone":
- Not separated from other;
- Including someone or something;
- with the company or help of others or other things.

So, when we are not separated from other,including someone or something, or with the company or help of others or other things, means we are not alone.

Are we satisfied with those definitions?
Could them cover enough "Not Alone" from any perspectives?

Are they suitable for this condition, examples:
- One country which built in one island, has 100 people as a member, who have suspicious feeling for each other.
- Two girl walk side by side are going to one park, one of them talk on her mobile phone.
- A husband who likes to entertain his wife, who likes to reject her husband.

Or we will need another word to describe those conditions?

Tergila-gila..

Waktu itu monas masih jadi salah satu tujuan wisata..(sekarang?)

Waktu itu sudah sore menjelang malam..
Papah, Mamie, adik-adik dan diriku, baru sampai di taman monas.
Sebentar lagi akan ada atraksi air mancur.
Dalam kondisi sekitar yang agak temaram..terlihat ada beberapa penjual dengan beraneka barang dagangan.
Namun yang paling teringat adalah tukang jualan poster, ada bermacam poster digeletakkan si bapak penjual di atas alas plastiknya.

Mengapa yang paling teringat tukang jualan poster?
Itu karena dia menjual poster seorang bintang yang sedang menjadi idolaku..yaitu: John Stamos (bener gak ya tulisannya).
Sesungguhnya pun bukan hanya karena ada poster itu saja, tapi lebih karena tindakan yang dilakukan sesudah melihatnya..yaitu..menciumnya!
Hahaha..yah..tindakan norak itu yang menjadi reminder nya dan ucapan Mamie menjadi penegasnya..katanya waktu itu.."nih anak sugesti-an".
Ketidakmengertian tentang arti kata sugesti-an itulah yang bikin susah sekali tuk melupakan kejadian itu.

Setelah lebih bisa kontrol diri, tindakan tiba-tiba mencium yang diidolakan memang bisa dieliminir..tapi tidak dengan berarti tidak tergila-gila akan sesuatu lagi.
Tergila-gila akan sesuatu atau beberapa hal hampir tidak bisa ditahan..malah setelah semakin tahu nikmatnya hidup semakin bertambahlah yang digilai..

Coba bayangkan, pasti akan sulit tuk tidak tergila-gila kalau..
Bertemu dengan buku yang menggugah hati dan pikiran..seperti Il Postino atau Vahdventure..
Atau, bertemu dengan komik yang lucu, menghibur sekaligus mengharukan..seperti Miiko.. (eh, komik juga buku ya?).
Atau, bertemu anjing yang lucu, menghibur, menggemaskan, cantik, ganteng, pintar, seperti Luv..Liv..Keiko..
Atau, bertemu lagu-lagu yang bagus, lirik dan melodinya menggugah hati..seperti lagunya George Michael..Sting..John Meyer..Sheryl Crow..Fourplay..Michael Frank..Sugarbabes..(eh..dah kebanyakan ya?).
Atau..(..bisa bantu mengisi bagian sini..?).

Ada satu hal yang disenangi tetapi tidak sampai tergila-gila..
Seperti bertemu dengan orang-orang yang menyenangkan..yaitu: semua teman-temanku..!
Ini.mungkin karena sadar bahwa mereka benar-benar sesuatu yang memiliki kebebasan tuk bergerak dan menentukan keberadaan mereka.
Hidup membawa mereka kemanapun hidup mau.
Sama seperti perjalanan keberadaan diri sendiri..hidup membawaku kemanapun hidup mau.

Sejak kecil, punya banyak teman tidak pernah menjadi target.
Mungkin karena saat itu ada banyak hal yang harus dimainkan, diperhatikan, dilakukan seperti: bermain sepeda, bermain rumah-rumahan, bersih-bersihin ruang kelas waktu TK (ini kesukaan sebelum dijemput pulang sekolah), belajar menggambar, belajar main kasti, belajar matematika, belajar bahasa Inggris, bermain Tak Benteng, memperhatikan bunga kembang sepatu, menyenggol-nyenggol tanaman putri malu supaya malu-malu menutup daun dan bunganya.. menangis dan merenung mengapa diejek kristen-kristen karena memakai baju dan sepatu warna putih, memijat pergelangan tangan ibu guru Yok yang keseleo karena main voley (..kalau tidak salah ingat)..pokoknya sibuk.

Berdasarkan pengalaman..
Teman datang..dengan banyak cara namun pergi dengan sedikit cara.
Namun, entah mengapa tetap ada keyakinan, bahwa ke mana pun teman berada, bila memang pertemanan itu tak terbantahkan oleh jarak dan waktu..pertemanan pasti tetap tinggal bersama.
Datang dengan cara yang tak biasa, sudah menjadi kebiasaannya.
Pergi dengan cara yang biasa, sudah pula menjadi kebiasaannya..pertemanan.

Tergila-gila bisa terjadi pada seorang teman bila...teman biasa itu berubah status menjadi teman luar biasa.
Tidak bisa tidur, tidak nafsu makan, tidak berselera terhadap lagu tertentu..hanya bisa membayangkan dirinya, hanya nafsu tuk ketemu dia, hanya berselera mendengar suaranya..benar-benar hanya dia..hahaha..repotnya.

Tergila-gila yang jenis terakhir ini akan menyenangkan kalau..ternyata juga digila-gilai olehnya..jadi gayung benar-benar bersambut.

Hanya mungkin satu yang patut disadari..
Perginya pertemanan jenis ini sering kali punya kebiasaan terjadi dengan cara yang tak biasa..hingga membuat kekagetan yang cukup luar biasa.
Hingga sering ditemukan menimbulkan histeria.
Sehingga kemudian lahirlah cerita-cerita tak biasa terhadap dia yang mengalaminya.

Tergila-gila sepertinya hampir dimiliki semua dari kita.
Hhhmmm..
Sesungguhnya tak pernah ada penawarnya tuk tak begitu.
Hhhmmm..
Andaikan ada yang telah menemukan formula anti tergila-gila..
Mungkin..dunia akan biasa-biasa saja ya?

..4 hari..4 perbatasan negara..di akhir tahun 2005

Berada di kapal Ferry Batam - Singapura..ada sedikit perasaan aneh, seperti baru mencoba makanan negeri entah berantah yang berempah namun sedikit berkuah..agak anyir tapi cukup bisa diterima lidah.

Perasaan aneh itu..
Mungkin karena tak bersama siapapun yang dikenal..
Mungkin juga karena itu perjalanan pertama berada hampir di luar yuridiksi tanahku..
Mungkin juga karena perjalanan itu sesungguhnya terjadi tanpa rencana, diputuskan dengan cepat dan dipastikan tuk terjadi..terjadilah..
Mungkin juga karena belum terbayangkan apa yang menanti di sana..
Mungkin..semua mungkin..

Beruntung masih ada XL, yang membuat kendali tetap dalam genggaman.. : )

Serasa melayang sampailah di pelabuhan..mengikuti antrian di imigrasi..hingga tiba giliran..dan tak lama kulihat tangan dari seseorang yang kukenal melambai ke arahku..ohh..Icha!
Dia bersama kekasihnya..Nick.

Tiba-tiba berada di jalan raya..di dalam mobil..memandang tata letak gedung dan lampu kota..menarik!
Hhhmmm...Where's the air?
Ah, sudah simpan dulu pertanyaanmu..lelah kaki dan mata hanya menuntun memasuki rumah dan kamar yang disediakan mereka berdua..
But still..wondering..w h e r e i s t h e a i r..?
Take a bath! Refresh the body! So, maybe the air can be felt..
Yeah..done!
Walaupun tetap tak terasa ada udara atau angin sejuk di sekitar, beberapa waktu berada di antara air cukup menyejukkanku..

Time for dinner..me..icha..nick and libby, the gorgeous female golden!
......and....time for sleep come..

Terjaga pada sekitar jam 5 pagi memberi waktu tuk memperhatikan sekitar lewat jendela..tiada gerakan daun terjadi..mereka semua diam seperti lukisan tak bernyawa.
Ac kamarpun tak kuasa menyejukkan.
Seperti berada dalam slow motion sebuah film..really slow.
Beruntung hari-hari sebelumnya sudah menjadi bagian dari kota jakarta yang tak terkirakan terik dan berdebunya..
Namun situasi tetap membawa pada pertanyaan yang sama, where's the air..karena Jakarta pun tetap memilikinya, terutama di jam-jam begini.

Mentari menjelang..bertemu kembali dengan icha..nick..libby..
Ketika cahayanya menguat..datanglah tamu dari negeri Malay yang kutunggu dan menjadi alasan perjalanan itu..Greece Lee!
Masih seperti pertama kali bertemu..menyenangkan!

Hohoho...
The real adventure is began!

..bersambung..

..just arrived from holiday..2

..mengeluh dengan lenguhan manja..
Ya, si tampan yang sedang dimabuk asmara karena wanginya si cantik..mulai kehilangan kesabaranya tuk kebersamaan mereka.

Sedang si cantik terlihat mulai mengantuk dan menikmati kasur bersihnya yang baru.., si tampan terlihat ingin segera mendekati dan menyampaikan maksudnya yang sangat mungkin akan dihadiahi beberapa gigitan.

Kedekatan mereka beberapa kali menimbulkan goncangan, cukup hebat. Beberapa kali didapati gigi si cantik menempel di pipi atau leher si tampan..

Belum sampai 5 menit pun pada jam ini, terdengar kesibukan mereka yang sama itu.

Akankah malam ini menjadi malam yang panjang bagi si cantik tuk bertahan dan bagi si tampan untuk mencoba? : )
Mungkin inilah malam perayaan bagi si tampan karena telah kembali ke rumah aslinya.

Malam telah larut..tirai telah diturunkan..aktivitas si tampan telah menurun..tetapi lenguhan manjanya telah mulai lagi..kubiarkan si cantik menikmati lenguhan itu..karena esok masih kan menjelang, dan berarti ada beberapa agenda yang harus terealisasikan..

Selimut dan segala yang kan menyamankanku telah memanggil..
..sampai ketemu lagi..
Dan tuk kamu tampanku..bersabarlah..dia akan selalu menjadi milikmu..
Love u both!

Luv n liv, just arrived from holiday..

Sejak selasa sore hingga jumat sore ini, rumah kedua kesayanganku kosong..sepi..
Udara dingin tak berhasil membuat mereka kedinginan, karena mereka berada di tempat yang hangat jauh dari keramaian dan juga jauh dari diriku..

Sepi, tak ada lenguhan manja si jantan yang tampan dan si betina yang cantik..sepi..
Tak ada guk-guk-kan tanda memanggil tuk makan pagi dan malam atau ajakan tuk bermain..sepi..

Tak ada sambutan lucu dan menggemaskan ketika aku tiba dari manapun..
Tak ada kegiatan pembersihan di pagi hari yang sering membuat punggungku melengkung dan nyeri..
..sepi..

Namun, udara dingin membuatku lega jauh dari mereka..
Karena, harapan akan keadaan yang lebih baik tuk mereka di sana.
Karena rasa tak sanggup memberikan yang terbaik pada mereka sejak hari selasa itu.
Karena kiranya tak bisa ditawar lagi tuk kami berjauhan dulu.

Pada hari Minggu sianglah semuanya bermula.
Diklat 3 hari 2 malam menjadi pengawal cerita hari selasa itu.
3 hari 2 malam, meminta perhatian lebih, sehingga tak memungkinkanku berada di dekat kedua kesayanganku.
Setelah itu, kelelahan melanda tak terkira, dan hpku menyampaikan pesanku ke sana tuk menyelamatkan keduanya..hingga waktu yang kemudian kuputuskan..

Malam menjelang jumatnya, hati tak kuat menahan rindu..dalih tuk melunasi semua fasilitas yang telah mereka dapat membawaku ke sana..
..sebuah toko yang menjual makanan, barang, jasa memandikan plus mengharumkan termasuk menerima mereka yang lucu tuk tinggal beberapa waktu..Thyta Petshop.

Maka kuhabiskanlah 1 jam tuk memberikan kerinduanku hanya kepada si tampan dan si cantik yang begitu montok dan berbulu berada dalam pelukanku.
Fuiiih....
Malamnya tidurku nyenyak..namun segera terbangun tuk mendapatkan pagi yang baru..yang berarti tibalah hari kepulangan mereka.
Yipiiiie!

Wangiiii...duh, menggemaskan.!
Wanginya si cantik yang menurutku sama dengan wanginya si tampan, mengacaukan kontrol diri si tampan.. : ) hingga beberapa gigitan si cantik memberi peringatan dan si tampan..mundur sebentar tapi mengulanginya lagi dan lagi.. Mereka menghiburku sepenuh hati.. : p

Si cantik kuselamatkan dalam pelukan..cium pipinya..tungkuknya..elus bulunya..telinganya..tangan mungilnya..di depan kaca mobil..
Mata si cantik mengerjap..melengkungkan kepalanya menyusup ke tanganku..atau kadang menatapku dengan lidah yang keluar sedikit.. mengemaskan..

Si tampan mulai mengeluh manja..

..bersambung..

Presentasi diri seorang teman..

Siang ini ada keasikan baru di komputer..membaca blog seorang teman.

Perkenalan yang diawali kekaguman, telah membawa kami pada beberapa tahun pertemanan.
Namun, baru siang ini, setelah membaca blognya..keyakinanku bertambah akan kekagumanku.

Begitu sulit menggambarkan perasaan senang mendapati bahwa dia memang begitu spesial dan mengagumkan. Tahun yang berjalan telah memproses dia sehingga kini semakin memperlihatkan kearifan, kepekaan, kekompleksannya dan keluasan wawasannya dalam merespon dunianya dan dunia yang lain. Tak akan mengherankan bila suatu saat dia bisa menjadi apapun yang dia inginkan.

Tiada hal yang kututupi terhadap kekagumanku padanya. Bila dia tak lupa, ungkapan itu telah jelas kunyatakan langsung padanya pun sebelum aku membaca blognya itu. Tanpa pengetahuanku tentang pemikirannya yang tertulis itu pun aku mengucapkan sayangku padanya..jadi kini sungguh nyata dia memang memiliki alasan tuk semua ungkapanku.

Bahagia tuk bacaan yang dihidangkannya sungguh baru bagiku..
Beruntung aku belum membacanya ketika kusampaikan semua ungkapanku padanya.
Sehingga sungguh aku yakin telah mendapatkan rasa kekaguman itu dari hal yang cukup biasa daripada tulisannya yang terakhir kubaca, sehingga kekaguman itupun kuungkapkan dalam bahasa dan gairah yang cukup terkendali. Karena tak terbayangkan, akan begitu berlebihannya kekaguman yang kutanggung bila itu kukatakan seketika setelah aku membaca blognya yang mungkin telah ada saat itu.

Ingin rasanya aku mengutarakan kekagumanku sesegera mungkin..
Tapi kutau bukan waktunya kini untuk itu.
Cukup sms menjadi penanda baginya, bahwa aku ada dan memperhatikannya.
Kurasa dia menghargai itu sebagaimana bisanya.
Tiada yang sempurna di dunia ini, itu tergambar jelas di benak kami.

Tuhan menghubungkanku lewat perasaan dan mimpi..
Mungkin cukup tuk saat ini.
Hanya Dia yang mengerti tentang seharusnya yang terjadi.
Mengikuti kata hati..membawaku melewati waktu dengan kebahagiaan.
Cerita panjang dan pendek, sedih dan senang silih berganti..membawaku dalam duniaku yang sesekali tersentak oleh kehadirannya.
Kini tak mudah bagiku tuk berkata "tidak" atau pun "iya".
Hanya yang terbaik yang kuharapkan yang terjadi kepadanya, seperti yang terbaik yang selalu terjadi kepadaku.
Terima kasih.

My Luv n Liv..

Cup...cup...cup...Love u so muaachh..
Liv: I'll be waiting u jump from this troiler..hon...
Luv: Be patient my beautiful wife.. : )